ChelleVille

“But how,” said Charles, who was close to tears, “how can you possibly justify cold-blooded murder?’
Henry lit a cigarette. “I prefer to think of it,” he had said, “as redistribution of matter.”

Is there ever going to be a week that will go by without either Kanye West or his fiancée Kim Kardashian featuring in Celebrity Watch? CW’s gonna be totally honest with you: it doubts it. It doubts it all to hell and back.

This week, West made the Press Association ticker-tape by releasing a new song, I Won, in which he paeans Kardashian in rhyme: “I wanna dip that ass in gold” he raps, a proposition that makes CW incredibly nervous, given how badly a similar process went for Shirley Eaton in Goldfinger.

But even as CW was fretting over this terrible health-and-safety issue, West had gone on to make his next major statement. Recalling how Kardashian chose a rap star (him) over a sports star (some sports stars), he rapped, “I made it over NBA, NFL players/ So every time I score it’s like the Super Bowl.”

Now, while CW does not doubt that this lyric comes from a place of love and admiration, it feels it must caution West as to the unfortunate nature of this particular simile. Saying “I made it over NBA, NFL players” makes it sound like there was a huddle of them, grouped around Kardashian’s private areas, that West had to bust through while wearing a helmet and gumshield, that one billion people watched it on TV and that the Red Hot Chili Peppers played at half-time.

And as for “So every time I score it’s like the Super Bowl” — has he even thought about this? The goalposts in the NFL are 40ft tall and 18ft 6in wide and Kardashian’s just had a baby. To be honest, given the circumstances, this is the worst simile for making love to your wife ever.

—Caitlin Moran’s “Celebrity Watch”, The Times, Friday 18th April (via theinternethassexwithitself)

(via fuckyeahcaitlinmoran)

theshoegirldiaries:

tinaleung:

#OnceUponaTime at @charlotte_olympia 👸 #charlotteolympia #pfw #fw13 (at Tina Loves Paris)

Where dreams are reality x

I JUST BOUGHT THESE!!!!

theshoegirldiaries:

tinaleung:

#OnceUponaTime at @charlotte_olympia 👸 #charlotteolympia #pfw #fw13 (at Tina Loves Paris)

Where dreams are reality x

I JUST BOUGHT THESE!!!!

stannisbaratheon:

live-action modern day “the lion king”
NEW YORK, 1960s. The civil rights movement reaches its crest. Mufasa, a prominent activist leader in the city, clashes against his younger brother Scar, himself a prominent leader of the mafia underground. Politics against politics, brother against brother; Mufasa dies, Scar reigns. A new law governs New York in the 70s: blood and bribery.

Idris Elba as Mufasa, Michael K. Williams as Scar, Naomie Harris as Sarabi, Jaden Smith as Young Simba, Amandla Stenberg as Young Nala (not giffed), Taraji P. Henson as Timon, Mo’Nique as Pumbaa, Chiwetel Ejiofor as Older Simba, Kerry Washington as Older Nala, John Boyega as Kovu, Zoe Kravitz as Kiara.

apparently this is my contribution to mankind

So where’s the kick starter link?

(via tallythor)